Ahh...memories...

Every time I log into my mail.ru (popular Russian e-mail site) account, on the main page, past the news feed and advertisements, I notice, in the lower right-hand corner of the screen, a series of pictures. These are, I assume, pictures that have all been taken (and posted) by users. I've investigated this and found that they are categorized by topic and you can also search by topic and/or key words. Tonight, I saw a picture of this little girl (Vika was her name) holding a kitten. She was standing in front of a green-painted fence and looking straight into the camera - not serious, but also not smiling. For some reason this photo struck me, though I moved on and, later, wasn't able to locate it again when I had the following idea. I thought, "wouldn't it be cool if every now and then I just did a random search by a given topic and picked out the first photo that reminded me of Ukraine and/or just really struck a chord with me?" The answer is, "yes, that would be very cool" and nice, simple way to reminisce, when I can't always rely on my own pictures and/or memory to re-light the memories of days spent in Krasnograd.

So, with this in mind, the first picture to appear will be this random page from an old yearbook from School No. 4, featuring Yevtushenko Tetiana Vasil'evna - the later-director of School No. 4
and reason I ended up in Krasnograd, as she was the "mover and the shaker" behind getting a volunteer. (See top left photo)

Jokes...Boots...Russian-style

I was talking with my supervisor at the end of last week and, in talking with one of our students who's been having a hard time seeing the positives in life, he recounted a joke that helped lift her spirits a bit.

What's the difference between a Russian pessimist and a Russian optimist? A Russian pessimist says, "Things couldn't get any worse." The Russian optimist says, "Sure they could."

And, with this in mind, I was browsing the Internet and found this anecdote about the "flying shoe" incident that currently took place during a press conference held in Iraq, where an Iraqi journalist threw BOTH of his shoes at President Bush. I found this joke in Russian, but don't know where it originated. In any case, I've done my best with the translation.

Joke:

Что будет, если в главу страны кинуть ботинок?
What happens if a boot is thrown at the leader of a country?

Буш: Уворачивается, потом говорит: "Ботинок был десятого размера!",
кинувшего ботинок уводит охрана и ломает ему руку.

Bush: He ducks and then says: "That boot was a size 10." Security then takes away the person who threw the boot and breaks his arm.

Путин: Ловит ботинок на лету, кидает обратно и попадает агрессору между глаз. Затем того уводит охрана, и больше ничего о нем не известно.

Putin: He catches the boot mid-air, throws it right back and hits his attacker between the eyes. Then security takes the man away and nothing more is ever heard of him.

Медведев: Пригибается, так что ботинок пролетает над ним, говорит: "ну что ж, каждый имеет право на высказывание своего мнения...". Хулигана уводит охрана, на следующий день его увольняют с работы.

Medvedev: He bends over so that the boot flies over him, then says: "Well, every man has the right to express his opinion." The trouble-maker is led away by security and the next day he's fired from his job.

Обама: Не успевшего снять ботинок хулигана ловят охранцы и выносят на руках из помещения. Все уверены, что человеку просто стало плохо.

Obama: (working on this one...)

Ху Цзиньтао (председатель КНР): При входе ботинконосителя в здание штатный телепат охранки замечает подозрительную мыслительную активность, охрана задерживает всех в радиусе 10м до выяснения обстоятельств.

Hu Jintao (Paramount Leader of the People's Republic of China): While everyone wearing boots enters the building, the official state telepath of security notices some suspiciously thoughtful activity; security detains everyone within a 10-meter radius until the exact details of the situation can be determined.

Ющенко: Получает ботинком прямо в лицо, после чего обвиняет кинувшего ботинок в том, что он "агент Кремля" и хочет "подорвать независимость Украины". Набегают сторонники Тимошенко и начинают скандировать антиющенковские лозунги.

Yushchenko (President of Ukraine): He takes the boot straight in the face, after which he accuses the boot-thrower of being an "agent of the Kremlin" trying to "undermine Ukraine's independence." Timoshenko supporters then run up and start chanting anti-Yushchenko slogans.

Саакашвили: Увидев летящий в него ботинок, прячется под стол и оттуда оповещает всех присутствующих о прекращении выступления "ввиду неожиданного изменения ситуации". Охрана выдавливает всех из помещения.

Saakashvili (President of Georgia): After seeing that a boot is flying at him, he hides under a table and from there informs all those present that the day's event has come to an end "in light of unexpected changes in the situation." Security then forcibly removes everyone from the premises.

Лукашенко: Уворачивается от ботинка. Охрана берет оппозиционера под руки и подводит к президенту. Лукашенко спрашивает "чем вы недовольны?", выслушивает ответ, и начинает рассказывать, сколько он сделал для улучшения жизни народа и процветания Беларуси. Устыдившегося оппозиционера уводит охрана.

Lukashenko: Turns away from the boot. Security takes the oppositionist into custody and brings him to the president. Lukashenko asks, "Why are you unhappy?" Hearing the answer, he then begins to talk about how much he's done to improve the life of the people and prosperity of Belarus. The ashamed oppositionist is then taken away by security.

Назарбаев: Уворачивается от ботинка, подбегает к бунтовщику и лично избивает его, с помощью охраны.

Nazarbayev (President of Kazakhstan): Turns away from the boot, then runs up to the rioter and kills him personally with help from security.

Пратибха Патил (женщина, президент Индии): Ловит осторожно брошенный ботинок на лету, прижимает его к груди, и начинает петь и танцевать. Охрана водит хоровод вокруг кинувшего ботинок, который также поет и танцует.

Pratibha Patil (woman President of India): With care, she catches the thrown boot in mid-air, presses it to her bosom and begins to sing and dance. Security then leads a circle-dance around the person who threw the boot, who is also now singing and dancing.